POLITICS: Name the mystery man
And an old favourite makes a fleeting return
Names, names, names
It would be unchivalrous for the Snake to suggest that our lady candidates resemble buses (certainly, not the back of) but PPCs tend to follow the habits of this popular media for public transport by arriving in fours. So who are the lucky lovelies this week?
Neil Carmichael in Stroud and Richard Benyon in Newbury return to fight the same seats as last year. Both are very much old school Tories. Mr Benyon, 42 and a farmer, is an ex-Green Jacket, a scion of the Cecil family and the nephew of Bill Benyon, the formidable former MP for Buckingham and then Milton Keynes. He was educated at the academically unchallenging mix of Bradfield College and the Royal Agricultural College, Cirencester. Mr Carmichael, 40, a One Nation Tory (remember them?) is a former hill farmer in Northumberland and a lecturer at Sunderland and de Montfort Universities. He fought a Euro-seat in 1994 and Leeds E in 1992. Educated at St Peter's School, York and Nottingham Uni, he was briefly a member of the SDP (which, if elected, to my reckoning would bring the number of ex-Social Democrats on our green benches to four).
Rugby & Kenilworth, fought by David Martin, a retread MP, last time round has now opted for youth. Their new David is Jeremy Wright, a 29-year-old barrister and chairman of Warwick & Leamington Association. I know nothing about him but he must be a safe loyalist because he was one of the few allowed to speak at the Theresa-fest, the gathering once known as party conference before it was successfully rebranded.
Hammersmith & Fulham - once represented by the undeniably decent Matthew Carrington - chose Greg Hands, an energetic local councillor who wears the badge of honour of being branded racist by The Guardian for running a 'Fulham homes for Fulham people' campaign. Why believing that local people should get precedence over passport forgers from Lagos (or fat blonde girls from Chelsea) is racist strikes me as a little bizarre, but, heh, you mammals are a law unto yourself. Mind you, quite the most impressive thing about Mr Hands is that, once upon a time, he was in receipt of favourable attention from our old friend, Miss Emma Swann. A small world, with much misery in it. But Mr Hands has many things to thank the Money God for. Despite having read history at Robinson College, Cambridge, he managed to make potloads of dosh working for Japanese banks. Enough lucre to retire a few years back, aged 30 or so, to consign himself to a life of financially-unrewarding political messing about. A beautiful correspondent in pearls tells me that he is indifferent to danger and has a sense of fun. Kewl. He gets awarded a forked kiss from The Snake.
More excitements. I hear that the safe-seat of Wantage has aroused the interest of Lord Astor, a local resident and former minister. The defenestration of so many hereditaries gives the party a chance to draw on their experience and wider vision. The Lib Dems have the splendid Lord Thurso in the lower house, we demand a lord too to keep the Earl of Ancram happy. Angie Bray, the splendidly right-wing but civilised GLA member for West Central is also thought to interested too.
A free copy of the Daily Mail to the winner
You’ll recall that I mentioned there were four charmers this week, and the smarter (straight onto the Gold List for you!) among you will have noticed . . . I’ve only named three names. What gives? Well it’s time for an ERO innovation, it’s time for: Teaser of the week
who is the recently selected PPC who was born-again when he changed his surname?
Friends and family, and employees of the webzine, can enter this competition. Piles more to play with next week — it’s go, go, go-time out there for PPPCs at the moment — so tune in then, politician-pickers.
As ever all information, tips, conspiracy theories and downright fantasies gratefully received and churned out. Email me in complete confidence. How else am I supposed to find out that if you took every single person currently on the list, you could barely fit them all onto the Isle of Wight?
— The Snake
selected Tory PPCs
CandidateWatch archive
CandidateWatch, October 2, 2002 11:26 PM